Things never come to a stop..

I'm so tired! Really very tired of everything. I want to give up in every single thing. Things seems to going backwards. Da Sao is asking a divorce from my bro. And bro have shifted to my place. It so heartache to see all this repeating again.. How about the little ones? How will they feel? Yes, Shamaine is showing her strong front to everyone. I show myself in her. I can feel that she is hiding all her feeling deep inside, crying by her own in the night. Da Sao and bro are not in talking terms. So I will be the middle person to relay the message to them. Everything just going back to what I have went thru. What is marriage all about? What is love all about? Mummy and bro have to go thru this stage! Will I go through the same thing down the road?? No one will know.. It just made me want to go back to my ownn world. Being there alone, doing evry single thing by my own without explaining to any single sole. I miss mum so much!! Why did things happen so sudden?? I'm a lost kid without my mum!!! Can I have her back?? I still cant let go the image how she shut her eyes infront of me. How she look when she was lying in the hospital unmontionless.. Her cold body with the tube in her mum!! I cant erase them off!!! It keep reflecting in my mind.. Is so painful to have those image.. I think i'm dead when mum have left me.. Can i also just shut my eyes forever from this world??